Transition Time

I met with our pulpit committee last night. They have a big job to do but they are up for it. They have about a month to receive resumes, review the pastor's job description and compensation package, prepare for screening and interviewing and a whole lot of praying. If the process stays on track without too many delays the church could be voting on a pastor by April.

Theresa and I will relocate to Houston in about a month. We will be working with Apartment Life Cares as a residential ministry team. We're sad to leave a great church. But we're excited about ministry in a new place. I'm pretty sure I've had enough snow and cold to last me for awhile.

The transition period is full of challenges. It teases us with potential. And we can learn a lot. I'm looking forward to the fruit of the transition process.

The Exasperated Life

Raising kids is one of the greatest responsibilities most people will ever face. The impact parents have on their kids is usually greater than most parents can appreciate day by day. To a great degree, when children become adults the product is the sum of parental input. When you look around at the messed up people in the world you have to wonder what kind of parenting was offered to them. We have to be wise and forward thinking about how we raise kids because the implications are far reaching.

Ephesians 6:4 provides an interesting insight for us. "Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord." The word "exasperate" is an interesting choice by the NIV translators. Most translations use the word "provoke." Paul warns fathers that their parental leadership style, while well meaning, might cause their children to feel exasperated or provoked. I want to look at this from a couple of applicational viewpoints.

First, everything parents do or say concerning their children will produce some kind of fruit. Children will have feelings about what their parents do or do not do. And the children will behave in a certain way based on those feelings. If the child feels like they are backed into a corner there will be some kind of response to go with those feelings. Children are impulsive, not known for thinking things through. Provoking or exasperating them isn't going to produce a positive outcome. Training and instructing children, on the other hand, is the method that has a far better chance for success.

Second, there is a huge contrast between these two models. The parent who exasperates is usually trying to manipulate the child and get them to comply. It focuses on the quickest possible way to achieve compliance. The teaching model is not as much focused on compliance as it is on formation of knowledge, skill and character. It has a "long game" focus. Exasperation will achieve compliance for some time until the child has finally had enough and acts out on those feelings, particularly in their teens. The teaching model might not seem to get results as quickly, but when the child does comply they are more likely to incorporate the teaching goals into their every day life.

Third, there is an immediate and a long term impact. I've explored this in relation to exasperation or provocation.

People often read Ephesians 6:4 and think of the "right now" implications. They back the child into a situation where it is a "lose-lose" scenario. The parents may not intend for this to happen, but the child feels this way just the same. The child feels "exasperated." Most parents have put their children in this position at some time. In our family I've done it. I've apologized to my kids and tried to be a better parent. The kids have turned out pretty good.

The long term exasperation is what we see coming out in our culture. We see it in many different ways. Exasperation may be a large contributor to societal problems like narcissism, addictive behavior and suicide. Here are a few long term impacts where we see exasperation lingering and continuing.

Long term impact #1 - Hurtful words and ideas can follow a person throughout their life. It's not enough that they felt provoked by their parents when they were growing up, but when they feel backed into a corner their memory replays the negatives. "You're so stupid." "You never get it right." The parents may no longer be living but the provocation continues. Fortunately, this can be put to an end, but it's not always easy to put the exasperation to rest and move on. People need help.

Long term impact #2 - The exasperation used by parents on their children becomes the model that those children use on their children. Grandpa used provocation. Dad used provocation. Now, here I am using provocation on my son. The exasperation model is learned and repeated. Some would call it a generational curse. Thank God, this is a curse that is not too difficult to break. Recognize a faulty parenting model for what it is and start dealing with it. Don't make excuses and create a new, positive model that will be perpetuated from now on.

Long term impact #3 - This is the most subtle form of long term exasperation. It is rooted in what we fail to teach our children and how they feel about it in their adult life. An adult faces continual, repeated feelings of exasperation when they keep falling into the same pitfalls of life over and over again. Maybe its financial distress based in lack of training concerning money management. The parent didn't equip their child to face that area of life challenge and the adult child is stuck in a cycle of financial exasperation. This can be corrected by learning things in adult life that we should have learned as children. Better late than never. The happiest adults don't have as much of this type of exasperation in their lives. It's one of the greatest gifts we can give our children.

For those raising kids right now the importance of training and instruction in the Lord can not be overstated. God's word is the best life instruction, life preparation manual available. Connect that with a regenerated life through relationship with Jesus Christ and the continual guidance and direction of the Holy Spirit and you've got the makings of successful child rearing.

If your parents didn't do that and you're struggling with life issues just go back and get the right foundation in place under your life. Come to God through Jesus Christ, having your sins forgiven and receiving new life. Make God's Word, the Bible, a consistent part of your life. Seek God's guidance daily in prayer and be open to the direction of the Holy Spirit. Let God untangle and heal the messes and hurts of your life. Keep moving forward. Pass on a new legacy to the next generation.

Stooping Down

I threw my back out on Mother's Day. The hardest thing has been bending down to get things, put on my socks, etc. You take energy and strength for granted until you don't have it. I'll be more careful next time (famous last words).

At our mid-week Bible study last night we spent time digesting Psalm 113. It's a great expression of praise. When I got home the following truth just wouldn't leave me alone.

Psalms 113:5-6 (NIV) Who is like the Lord our God, the One who sits enthroned on high, who stoops down to look on the heavens and the earth.

God has to come a long way to get to us. We forget how godly God is, how holy, how pure, how righteous, how eternal, how other than us He is. He is not only above the earth, He is above the heavens. He is "on high" and I'm not sure we can even grasp the idea of "on high."

What we do grasp is life down here. We understand need. We know dust and the ash heap. We know barrenness and unhappiness. We are connected to down here.

God sees us in our life down here because He makes the effort to be involved in what we are experiencing. He "stoops down" to be involved in our lives. I think the NIV doesn't capture this quite well enough when it says He "stoops down to look." Other versions translate this He "humbles Himself to behold." He's not just bending down to look down on us. He is getting down at our level and seeing the world at the level we see it. In fact, in human form Jesus experienced life as we experience it.

God not only sees our lives, but He gets involved. He helps us to find happiness even when circumstances are terrible. He turns our circumstances around. He lifts us up. In all our heaviness, when we feel like we're buried under our circumstance, God can easily handle the lifting.

With my back in pain reaching down wasn't easy. I was motivated. What was "down there" was worth the pain. I wanted to get dressed and I needed socks on my feet.

God demonstrates His love by "humbling Himself to behold" our lives. We're worth it to Him. Our problems are worth His time. Our heartaches matter enough to Him for Him to stoop down through heaven and down to earth.

Our response is to trust and praise Him. Louie Giglio describes worship like this - to "gaze long upon the Cross of Christ, fully absorb His beauty and pain, respond accordingly."

Psalm 113:1-3 (NIV) Praise the Lord! Praise, O servants of the Lord, praise the name of the Lord! Blessed be the name of the Lord from this time forth and forevermore! From the rising of the sun to it's going down the Lord's name is to be praised.

Not Easy To Follow

My wife and I were following some people in our car because we didn't know how to get to their house. We were in a large city with a lot of traffic. I tried to keep up, but eventually we got separated at an intersection. Fortunately, we were able to catch up by way of the cell phone.

I've had a few occasions in my walk with God where I felt like I lost Him at an intersection. He says "follow me." I've been preaching it for years. But there are some problems with following God.

He often leads in ways that are not easy for me to understand. His direction doesn't seem right. His timing definitely appears to be off schedule. Eventually, it all comes around. But in the mean time it can be a struggle trying to understand it.

He is unseen. God has been known to show up in a way that can be seen with human eyes. But for the most part He leads with whispers and gentle nudges. I have to be extra sensitive in order to follow Him.

He is always present with us. This is problematic in two different ways. First, I get so familiar with His presence that sometimes I'm just going along with my life and treat Him as a spectator or a travel companion. It's like He's just along for my ride. The second problem is that I think I need a little "me time" and that God is getting in the way. I've seen too many people fall in this way.

Exodus 40:36-38 (NIV) ³⁶ In all the travels of the Israelites, whenever the cloud lifted from above the tabernacle, they would set out; ³⁷ but if the cloud did not lift, they did not set out—until the day it lifted. ³⁸ So the cloud of the LORD was over the tabernacle by day, and fire was in the cloud by night, in the sight of all the house of Israel during all their travels.

I was thinking about what would happen if the Israelites left the camp and while they were gone the cloud moved. It would probably be easy enough to follow the tracks of a group that large. But they would have to pick up their pace and catch up.

In a modern scene we would get on the cell phone and triangulate our positions. With God, we just call on Him. We cry out for help. "Lord, here I am. I'm lost again. Help." And God shows up.

I don't always understand His ways and I can't see Him, but I know that He is always there, and that gives me comfort. I know that God is leading me according to His purpose and plans. And that is good.

Same God - Different Year

Someone asked me what God was telling me or showing me for 2011. I honestly didn't have anything profound for them.

A friend of mine said that he felt like God was telling him that 2011 was going to be just like 2010. Another person said that 2011 would be worse than 2010. Half of our government says that things are improving and the other half says it's not. The more I hear the more I know that I have to do my best to hear from God.

Every year I watch a spiritual landslide of "revelation" concerning the year we are entering into. It's as if God has more to say when our calendar rolls over than He does the rest of the year. I'm pretty sure that God is aware of things and is speaking to us all the time.

Hebrews 13:8 (NIV) Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever.

God is not limited to or bound by our calendar. He is the same every day. In 2011 we can trust in the same God we trusted in 2010. He is just as powerful, just as merciful and just as involved in our lives as He ever has been or ever will be.

Take a moment and remember a time, any time, in your life where God met a specific need. He is just as able to do the same thing today. God is not limited in how He can bless us by who is in the White House or the State House. God is not restricted to work in your life because you are dealing with some illness. God is not crippled by the economy, Wall Street or the housing market. If God was able to supply your needs in the past He is still able to do so today...and tomorrow.

We are taking some extra time to hear from God this month. The God who spoke to Saul on the Damascus Road can speak to us today. He has not changed.

Jeremiah 33:3 (NIV) ‘Call to me and I will answer you and tell you great and unsearchable things you do not know.’

Simple enough. Let's just do that every day.

Christ Appeared

"Before Christ" and "Anno Domini" signify the great line in history. Some are trying to erase that line. But God was the one who drew the line and nobody can erase it. Thank God that nobody can undo what He has done.

Christmas is all about the appearance of God in human form here on earth. Consider the following passage of Scripture. Pay special attention to what it reveals about why He appeared.

1 John 3:5-8 (NIV) 5 But you know that he appeared so that he might take away our sins. And in him is no sin. 6 No one who lives in him keeps on sinning. No one who continues to sin has either seen him or known him. 7 Dear children, do not let anyone lead you astray. He who does what is right is righteous, just as he is righteous. 8 He who does what is sinful is of the devil, because the devil has been sinning from the beginning. The reason the Son of God appeared was to destroy the devil’s work.

The devil uses sin the keep mankind separated from God. Not only does sin drive a wedge between man and God, it also wrecks human relationships and tears the fabric of society. But God has drawn a line in the sand. He appeared. He appeared to destroy the devil's work in our lives. He appeared to take away our sins.

If you are a believer in Jesus Christ there are three things that you need to be aware of.

1. You don't have to live under the curse of sin. Our free will allows us the choice to live a new life. The new life is not bent toward sin, but away from sin. You can choose to sin or not to sin. We value our free will and our liberty in Christ. But all too often we use our free will to choose sin, thinking that we're alright because God's grace is so powerful. The whole idea of "I don't have to" can be mistaken as a life option. "I don't have to sin anymore, but I will anyway, and fortunately I can lean on God's grace."

2. You should not be sinning. The works of the devil to continuously destroy your life with sin have been destroyed. Your response should be to stop sinning. There is a subtle difference between not sinning because you are exercising your human right to choose and an obedience to the imperatives of God. You are no longer your own. You now belong to Christ. If He is truly "Lord" of your life then it's His choice, not yours, that motivates you to stop sinning.

1 Corinthians 6:19-20 (NIV) ¹⁹ Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; ²⁰you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

This passage applies to all kinds of sin, but specifically addresses the sin of sexual immorality. It fits here because in the world of the Corinthian believers sexual morality as defined by their culture was in contrast with what God commanded. In our world this whole idea of sexuality is a battle ground. People would argue that their sex life is their choice. Not if you are a Christian. You have claimed Jesus as Lord of your life. How you use your body and your life is His choice.

3. Sin is sin and righteousness is righteousness. This isn't rocket science. "Do not let anyone lead you astray." This is as current as it can get. We basically know what sin is and we basically know what righteousness is. Yet we find ways to defend our choice to sin when we know that we should be living a "righteous" life. There are many voices trying to persuade us to call our sin righteous. The world is telling us that righteous people are sinful, especially if they speak out against sin.

You can choose what you want and say what you want, but God has already drawn this line. A little baby in the manger is a symbol of a line drawn between death and life, sin and righteousness, darkness and light. At the moment He appeared as a little baby took away the devil's power to destroy our lives with sin.

John 5:24 (NIV) “I tell you the truth, whoever hears my word and believes him who sent me has eternal life and will not be condemned; he has crossed over from death to life.

Praise God for His appearing and for the victory we have over sin. May we appreciate what He has given us in the way we live.

On a closing note I have been hearing a lot of people responding to a call to live holy lives. I have heard them describing it as God chasing them, not letting them be at ease with their sin. I believe that this is going to be a year of repentance and a return to righteousness.

One Flavor?

I love ice cream...all kinds. Vanilla has its place but I have to explore the variations and expressions of ice cream. Chocolate Chip, Pralines and Cream and the amazing classic, Rocky Road.

Even though a relatively small amount of vanilla ice cream is served it is universally the best selling flavor. Apparently there are a lot of people interested in basic ice cream. But a lot more people are interested in variety.

I believe that the Christian faith has one basic flavor...Jesus. There are a lot of expressions of that basic faith and together they make up the church.

Ephesians 4:4-6 (NIV) There is one body and one Spirit—just as you were called to one hope when you were called—one Lord, one faith, one baptism; one God and Father of all, who is over all and through all and in all.

I didn't find Jesus in a "vanilla" church. Maybe it was a "rocky road" church. Later I ended up in a military chapel and God placed me in leadership as the parish council president. The church was composed of Lutherans, Pentecostals, Baptists, Methodists, Episcopalians, etc. We had at least 31 flavors. What I learned back then was important and formative.

I have throughout the years met a lot of sweet people and a few nuts. I value the variety of expression in the church. When you get all of these flavors at the same table we can get to know Jesus more completely. Together we can reach our world better than we can apart. We are the body of Christ.

Why am I rambling on about this? First, I am aware that there are vanilla lovers who are critical of the non-vanilla flavors. There are non-vanilla flavors critical of vanilla lovers. If the basic flavor is Jesus, a biblically true Jesus, then what are we arguing about? Second, there are people moving from church to church looking for something. I believe what we're so often looking for may already be right in front of us but we miss it because we're distracted by the flavors. Third, our community needs the full expression of God, not just one flavor or another. Fourth, when we promote our flavor in the wrong way we affect the entire church adversely.

Jesus said, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." Together, those who come to Christ are the church....and it's a sweet thing!!!!